When All Is Quiet...

... or Creativity is Good For You!

I've been debating whether to write this post or not... and even now I've written it I'm not sure about it.  I don't want it to come across as all "woe is me" and I'm not the most eloquent of writers, but it's a subject that really interests me, although I'm sure other people have written far more insightfully on it. 

What really prompted me to go ahead and write was one of the daily themes from Bimble + Pimble's #BPsewvember over on Instagram.  I'm taking part (although I've missed a couple of days) and thoroughly enjoying seeing how other people interpret the themes and connecting with new to me Instagrammers and bloggers. 

The theme that prompted my ramblings today was the one entitled "Why Sew?"

I sew for a number of reasons; because I love wearing clothes that no one else has (I've mentioned here several times that I wanted to study fashion design when I left school, but wasn't able to); because I love the creative and intellectual challenges sewing presents and because it helps enormously when things get too much and my head feels like it's about to explode.

Picture credit: @marnie_makes on Instagram
Picture credit: @marnie_makes on Instagram

For the past few months I've been posting here less regularly than usual because although I've still been sewing, I'd been finding it increasingly difficult sometimes to summon up the energy to photograph and write about what I'd been making.  I've felt tired all the time and often can't be bothered to get myself dressed up and find a decent spot for photographs.  It turns out that this isn't just down to me being lazy, but actually due to (thankfully, fairly mild) depression and anxiety. 

I've had depression before, some years ago, and at that time I wasn't sewing or doing any creative hobbies really.  My main source of enjoyment then was reading, but I found it so hard to concentrate on even the simplest book when I was feeling low.  My mind would race all over the place and I wouldn't even take in half of what I was reading.  This time around however, I've found that sewing has helped me stay calm when anxiety and confused thoughts threaten to overwhelm me.   

And there are lots of other people taking part in Bimble + Pimble's Instagram challenge that seem to feel the same way.  People with varying degrees of mental health issues posted variations on my feelings that being creative helps them to stay positive and feel better.  There's something about sewing that means you have to concentrate in a completely different way, focussing purely on what you're doing at the time - or that's the way it works for me anyway.

Sewing also reminds me that I am good at something when my brain is telling me I'm rubbish at everything.   I just wish my sewing machine was quieter so that I could sew when I'm awake at 4am without disturbing my husband!

So what's the purpose of this post?  I suppose it's twofold really; firstly to let you know that even if I'm not here posting I am sewing and I will catch up eventually; and secondly to say that if you're feeling low and as if you're rubbish at everything, you're not (rubbish at everything).  Get a project out and sew, or knit, or whatever takes your fancy - even if it's something really simple - I'm sure it will help. 

By the way, I'm still posting progress shots and completed project photos along with various other rubbish on Instagram, so if you don't already follow me there, come over and see what I'm up to. 

18 comments

  1. Yes - to everything you said. This entirely resonates with me. In fact I stopped blogging completely for very much this reason, I could not muster enough of me to craft and blog and the crafting totally keeps me together. Even if I crochet one row or sew a key fob I know I'm capable of achieving something when I feel at my lowest.
    Enormous hugs Sam - you are a wonderful and talented woman x

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    1. Good to know I'm not the only one Jacq, thank you! Yes, sewing something simple or even knitting a couple of rows of stocking stitch can be an achievement and a confidence boost.

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  2. You should feel proud of yourself for writing this post Sam. I hope sewing continues to help you and I am sure your post will resonate with lots of other sewists.

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    1. Thank you Manju. It seems that it has already resonated with several others.

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  3. Once again, Sam, we're so much alike :-) I've had depression off and on my whole adult life, but last fall things got really bad - bad enough to send me to the doctor. No need to go through the symptoms; I had them all, but was most troubled by my inability to even think straight. Thank goodness for pharmaceuticals! And for craft. Like you, having some creative work to focus on was like a lifeline.

    Being in a similar position, I think that you can cut yourself some slack on the blogging front. I love seeing and reading about your projects, but I feel that blogging is (for us) not a job - it's another hobby, to be engaged in when we want to do it, but not a source of guilt when we don't. That said, I'm really glad to have "met" you and hope you're feeling your old self again soon. xoxo

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    1. Thanks Gail, yes it seems that we are very alike. Sorry to hear you've been suffering too. For me too thinking straight can be a real issue sometimes and it's so hard to explain to someone who doesn't know what it feels like. As you say, thank goodness for pharmaceuticals and craft.

      I hopefully will continue to blog as I do enjoy it, I just need to work out what works for me.

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  4. Great post. I too suffer from clinical depression and thankfully have now gone years without any anxiety or panic attacks. Depression still gets me though, and I do believe that sewing has saved my sanity quite often.

    As it relates to our sewing community...I think we can put WAY too much pressure on ourselves for the blogging bit. I really try to do write-ups on everything but honestly; I don't. And sometimes I just do a photo dump with BASIC info. "Cut size x, used x fabric, I like it/don't like it". It's nice when you can be super in depth but you shouldn't feel like you have to.

    Hang in there and don't let your mind play tricks on you. You are awesome. You are worthy. You are capable and able!

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    1. Ah thank you! Sorry to hear that you suffer with depression too. It seems that there are a lot of us our there. And you're right about putting too much pressure on ourselves with the blogging bit... after all, it's supposed to be fun.

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  5. So sorry to hear you're not feeling well, Sam. I'm with Gail about the blogging part, just blog if you want to, not because you feel like you have to. You're a very talented sewist and I not only like your blog but your Instagram pics as well!

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    1. Thank you Marianne. I'm pleased you like my Instagram pics.

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  6. sorry to hear that, when my dad died i could not find the energy to start anything for a while, and if i did, i couldnt concentrate for long. my mind would wander and i would lose interest. by strange coincidence a friend offered to teach me to crochet (after i flippantly said i wanted to learn) and it was a godsend. all i had to do was concentrate on the next stitch ..... it took a while before i was able to read a book, and i still enjoy crocheting..... the mind is such a delicate thing....................so important to take care of yourself and very strong of you to share. best wishes

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    1. Thank you Eimear. Sorry to hear about your dad. I think crochet is probably great because although you have to concentrate it's quite repetitive and soothing. Maybe I should get my crochet hooks out!

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  7. So sorry to hear that you suffer from depression, too. Please keep sewing. It will help. It does help. I could bore you to death about research that shows creative activities get people into the now, working mindfully, with purpose and give them a sense of fulfilment. I love seeing what you make. You are amazingly talented and a great teacher.

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    1. Thank you for your lovely words Jen. I'll definitely keep sewing, it is really helping and I'm glad you like seeing what I make!

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  8. You're brilliant my lovely and of course creativity is good for you, but your creativity is also good for us. We love seeing all the beautiful things you make and I aspire to one day being able to throw a frock together the way you do! If only, if only!!! x

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  9. So sorry you have been feeling depressed. A number of people in my family are sufferers and it can be very tiring for everyone. But one thing I have noticed is that they seem to have very high standards and to be high achievers too. The rest of us do "good enough" and don't worry too much. The positive side of your depression may be your wonderful sewing and high achievement at work.

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    1. That's very interesting Kate. I don't think of myself as a high achiever work-wise, but I am a bit of a perfectionist and I do worry about whether what I'm doing is to the right standard. Perhaps I need to try and tune into the "good enough" approach.

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